What happened on September 11th?

It’s been over a decade & now we are more confused about it than ever before.

Back in 2001 it was a hell of a lot clearer, back then you either knew that Osama Bin Laden did it or you watched Fox News & you knew that Saddam Hussein there wasn’t that much confusion back in the dark days of growing insanity after the attack. And today, if you are anything like my uncle, you probably still believe that Saddam Hussein attacked America on 9-11 for something about yellow-cake uranium.

Thank you Fox News.

But those were the heady days of the naughts & we are old now. Back then only 15% of the American public believed that it was a government conspiracy.

Today, the numbers have changed a bit & it all depends on your age.

The problem with this is blogs. Anyone these days can get a blog.

I have a blog…I have several blogs.

One of which is me turning around & writing what my drunk friends say & another one is me turning around & writing about history…which one is this right? It could go either way. In either case I try to make it very clear that I don’t take the subject seriously.

But the thing is I still have a blog…blogs. I still have blogs & you people read them.

I hope to God that you are taking them with a grain of salt.

I mean, I know a lot about history, I really do, & I sit down & do the absolute minimum of research on a topic….but…well…the bottom line is that you don’t know who the fuck I am.

Now don’t go away, I still want you to read, but face it, you don’t know me from Adam & chances are you’ve never even met Adam so why the fuck are you allowing him to vouch for me in the first place?

Because no one on the internet will ever tell you a lie. And if you believe that I know of a very rich, very dead relative of yours in Nigeria & if you will only give me you bank account numbers & your proper identification, I’ll send your inheritance right away.

2008 was a long time ago. It was seven-years after 9-11. Long enough to be considered “the day.”

Back in the day only 46% of the American public believed that Osama was the criminal mastermind behind 9-11. 25% didn’t know & 7% thought it was Israel. But 15% thought it was the US government.

If we peel back the onion & focus only on the millennial & post millennial crowd in America 15% still believe that it was the US government…

…but now 46% believe it was a Rothschild conspiracy.

Man the bridge! Women & Sheep overboard! Tin Foil hats people! We’re being swarmed by crazy!

Orders from Captain Zeep.

Did I point out that I have a blog? And Really, if it wasn’t for Laura & Mike pointing out every single awkward sentence, it would have absolutely zero peer-review.

Big Old Goose Egg.

But don’t you worry your little head. fifty-percent of those same age-groups believe that the Moon landing was suspect.

Now 8 out of 10 of them believe that Oswald did NOT act alone…& I’m with them on that one. That shit ain’t crazy.

But rather than blaming it on Dulles, like you should, or the Mafia, the CIA, Castro, Space Aliens, the FBI, or any of the other groups that shot Kennedy 129 times from 42 different angles, 7 out of 10 of those same kids blame the assassination on…..

…That’s right, the Rothschild family.

It’s what David Sedaris called NPR, “A Conspiracy of Jews.”

The same goes with the Lincoln assassination, he was killed, on the order of the Rothschild family because he wanted to shut down the Federal Reserve Bank, which is the same reason that Kennedy was shot, because the Rothschild family owns the Fed & the fed owns the UN & the UN controls the world and…

….I know, I know, 1865, 1913, 1945, 1963 it doesn’t really make any sense when you put it all on a timeline does it?

But I don’t really have to prove things in a blog, I don’t cite anything, not even on the history blog, because the serious history people that are my age & older will only really accept sources that are peer-reviewed anyway & they are only reading this for reasons of entertainment.

It’s not even Alex Jones crazy, because we all know that, year, the remake sucked but the original run of V was just fucking stellar & I don’t care if it’s science fiction & Kenneth Johnson claims to only be a writer/director & not a prophet, but goddamit, it was a great show & I’m going to believe it, Alex Jones is going to believe it & you should too.

Alex Jones believes in Lizard Aliens & we should too because V was about as awesome as the X-Files & Kolchak.

But most people in this particular age group do NOT believe that….because the remake sucked.

And because, yeah, it’s totally not realistic.

Completely different type of internet crazy.

“Why didn’t President Obama go straight to the Oval Office & get to work when he heard about the 9-11 Attacks?”

Goddamned timelines!

Only 6% of the American Population believes that Obama failed to preform his duties as president on 9-11. That is way down from the around 35% that believe he failed to preform his duties as president following Hurricane Katrina.

Nope. Totally different type of crazy. That is Fox News I’m-too-dumb-to-do-basic-math crazy.

Nope. That’s not crazy. That’s just stupid.

Nope. I’m not going to be begging any forgiveness about that one, if you are part of either of those numbers, you deserve to be called stupid.

If you believe in the Lizard Aliens I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt. You might be crazy, but you might just have a fan-boy sense of humor & in either case, crazy or comedian, you’re not that big of a threat to our country.

The real threat you have to keep your eye on are the kids. The little bastards.

Honestly, some of the shit they take seriously makes Wikipedia look like a good source.

There are a plethora of theories about 9-11.

And a plethora of pinatas.

The forewarning theory. Bush (or Obama if you watch Fox) had knowledge of the coming attack & did nothing to prevent it, because they are controlled by the Federal Reserve which is controlled by the Rothschild family, which controls the United Nations, which secretly controls the world.

It is called the LIHOP (“Let it happen on purpose”) theory & we are familiar with that one because of Pearl Harbor. Full disclosure, they both had a grain of truth behind them. Bush had a letter on his desk that read “Osama Bin Laden determined to attack within the United States.” Roosevelt had a similar letter about Japan. His was more along the line of “Hey wheels, we’re pissing the Japs off, they might declare war.”

In either case, knowing that someone wants to kill you & knowing exactly how, when, & where they are going to kill you are two completely different animals.

I love conspiracy theories, I really do, because they are always imaginative & creative, & they are works of art.

On the other side you have the ever-popular MIHOP (“Make/Made it happen on purpose”) theories. Like LIHOP, there is a plethora of theories behind it. A CIA wetworks team sneaked into the World Trade Center & wired the entire building with high explosives in a single night. Because, you know, that’s the only possible way it could fall like it did.

Or, a commercial liner couldn’t even dent a high-rise. Clearly the government fired a series of rockets at each of the twin towers. Which we can clearly see on the videos showing the towers fall.

That’s a memory thing, by the way, 90% of Americans remember watching both the towers fall on the television, but we really only saw the second tower fall.

Even history nerds like me that have memories that are tens-of-thousands of years long have to pause & remember that, no, I only saw the second tower fall. No one that wasn’t at or near ground zero saw the first tower fall.

That’s because it was a surprise.

Yay! We’re at war & our nation has gone insane.

In any case, MIHOP generally follows the theory that the CIA, Mafia, Castro, Lizard Aliens, Obama, Bush, & Mamie Eisenhower all conspired to wire & shoot rockets at the WTC (that we can all clearly see if we squint hard enough), on orders from the United Nations, which is controlled by the Federal Reserve Bank, which is controlled by the Rothschild family who has controlled the world since the days of Napoleon.

That’s why I love conspiracy theories. They always seem to miss the really creative part. They focus on the minute details, but they never really stop to explain how one could make that many people keep their mouth shut.

Anywho, it all comes back down to the fact that I have a blog.

I can write whatever the fuck I want to & its up to you to chose how much faith you are going to have in what I say.

There are millions of other people out there just like me. Some are a LOT more popular.

I’m looking at you Shane Dawson. I’m a big fan, but it’s because of you that kids are collectively having a really hard time determining truth from bull shit.

In Shane’s defense, he posts nothing news related. But he posts all the time & so does everyone else that age & younger. Everything is on the interweb.

Shane has a vlog & I watch it because it’s funny. Even when it’s not funny, he’s charismatic enough to carry your attention for 5 minutes. Throwing your life on the internet, that’s fine, it’s your thing & if you can make an old man like me laugh a little, guess what, I will subscribe to your page.

I hope you do the same for me…but you really don’t know who the fuck I am…& you only have my word on what my credentials are…& I could be full of shit. You don’t know, but whichever it is, I can promise you that this is NOT a peer-reviewed blog.

Blogs are not typically peer-reviewed. That’s what JSTOR is for. JSTOR can confirm that Dulles killed Kennedy. It will not however, confirm that the Rothschild family rules the world.

But that’s that isn’t it. When you live in a world on line, you don’t stop to think about who is fact checking what & things like the 9-11 conspiracy, they are posted on thousands of sites across the interweb, which is why, 13-years after 9-11, we know less about it than we did the minute it happened.


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